Hawaiian Weddings

14 Responses

1. Studious

   2010 Jul 25 1

   Snootiness I guess. If I spend money on vacation I will do it when I want and where I want. I do suppose if I had to travel anyway and pay for a hotel I would rather go some place nice, but truthfully I will probably just send regrets and a present.
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2. Giddy523Up

   2010 Jul 25 2

   cheaper, don’t have to invite everyone, not as much stress, you are already at your honeymoon (if that’s where you decide to have your destination wedding at)… RELAXING!!!

   but its not traditional!
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   At first, this was my choice, but "family needs" sucked me in and it was decided to do a small wedding at home first

3. Blondie

   2010 Jul 25 3

   It’s about intimacy and romance. Rather than throwing a wedding that caters to your friends and family you do something for yourself and spouse.
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4. Anthony

   2010 Jul 25 4

   I don’t get it either.
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5. Perse

   2010 Jul 25 5

   You get to go somewhere foreign, often tropical.

   Two birds one stone. Wedding and vacation.

   Your guests are only the people who really truly want to be there.

   The expense limits your guestlist so you can have the small wedding without the guilt. In addition to having the wedding without your gossipy second cousin or your sloppy drunk uncle.

   You get an amazing background for your wedding photos.

   It can be the more economical option.

   It adds to the excitement to be out of your comfort zone in your hometown.

   It is a compromise between getting married where his parents or her parents live.

   While you already have the time off work, might as well take advantage and go somewhere far away.

   You start your honeymoon right away.
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6. Messykatt

   2010 Jul 25 6

   Good question. I ended up with one, but it was also sort of more luck than brains. Our families were on opposite coasts, with several also in TX. So while I was trying to figure out where to have it, we got an offer of a free venue at Lake Tahoe (one of my top 3 fave places ever) and it was this gorgeous lake estate that could also take guests. So his family was totally up for it and so was mine. And I was stunned by how many friends pulled through! We had close to 70 total, although I did quietly help a couple people (best friend and family) with plane expenses.

   I’m really glad we did it that way, because the night reception was beyond gorgeous and as far as I know people had a great long weekend. A couple of them stayed a week.

   I also went to a destination wedding once several hours outside of DC that went over really well. So my experience isn’t with Bora Bora type places, but it’s all been good.
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7. kikismom

   2010 Jul 25 7

   To me it’s incredibly selfish of a couple to expect others to take their vacations where the couple wants to get married.
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8. Ezven

   2010 Jul 25 8

   I just recently got engaged, the wedding isn’t even for a year, and honestly with school and work and a huge family (gets expensive), and living in kind of a dry and ugly state, and just all the stress of where and what food and making all the guests happy (and the wedding still isn’t even for a year)…. I’mve been tempted to just run off to Hawaii with a simple beach wedding dress, a bouquet of lilies and hibiscus, just me and my sweetheart barefoot on the beach in the sunset with nobody but each other…. just seems so simple, relaxing, and romantic
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9. seamstress

   2010 Jul 25 9

   The honeymoon begins immediately.

   The guarantee of a small wedding (not many people may want a bride and groom to select their next vacation)

   Drunken Uncle Henry will not show up.

   An escape from inviting extended family because it is an intimate wedding.

   All the excitement for the bride and groom begin the moment they get off of the plane because there is no last minute rushing around to do as all arrangements are already set.
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10. Tricia G

    2010 Jul 25 10

    Selfishness.

    If you want a small wedding or to control costs, then have a small wedding at home. By having a destination wedding. all the couple did was to shift the costs to their friends and family who have to then pay thousands of dollars in airfare, meals, car rental, hotel, vacation time etc.

    I just wonder how everyone lost the their backbone and the ability to say no. Instead of simply saying "we’re having a small and intimate wedding", they have to make everyone get on a plane and travel 3 hours away just so drunken Uncle Harry on your mother’s cousin’s side is not invited. Just because the wedding is local doesn’t mean that you have to invite Uncle Harry and his drunken brood to your wedding. Just say no.
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11. Aisha A.

    2010 Jul 25 11

    Lovely. But if you have a lot of friends and family looking forward to your wedding then it will be a hassle on their part. If you really like it that much then better just keep the wedding to just you and your spouse to be. Seems fair to all, no ones get an invitation.
    References :
    http://www.allforyourwedding.com/

12. Garnet Glitter's No BS Zone

    2010 Jul 25 12

    I don’t get them either….weddings are supposed to be a family event….destination weddings screw the family concept royally, IMO…

    if you want an exotic local, elope. Do NOT expect family and friends to spend thousands of dollars and their hard earned vacation time on YOUR DREAM.

    jeeze.
    As far as no backbone in saying No..my family did. A relative of my daughter’s generation decided to have a destination wedding even tho she was told her parents could NOT afford to attend (the Father was out of work) and her grandparents’ health did not permit it…..

    Knowing this all the family refused to attend…even the groom’s family couldn’t afford the trip, never mind the accommodations.

    They would have to go it alone.

    When they saw NO BODY was coming, plans were changed. The wedding was held on home grounds. They didn;t have to-but if they wanted family to be there….that was the choice.

    The destination was saved for the Honeymoon.
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13. y2-y1

    2010 Jul 25 13

    I have given this answer before, but am happy to do it again.

    My husband and I had a courthouse wedding (which I loved), just the two of us. While it was really great, when our 20th anniversary was coming up, we decided to renew our vows and have a party. Initially, we were going to have a party at our home. The barebones guest list was 27 people. Well, when word got out, family said oh you need to invite such and such, him and her, and these people. I tried to explain that I wanted just the original guest list, but my mom said "people would be hurt if they weren’t invited". Please keep in mind that I was 48 at the time, but I still couldn’t disrespect my mom.

    Then mom said, "have it at the church" which I didn’t want, "hire this caterer" (I was going to just do party trays and take everyone out to dinner later), "get your flowers from this florist" (I do flowers, I just wanted a simple bouquet, and this florist is the most expensive in town and she had me decorating the whole church) and my favorite "you HAVE to have a photographer" (no I don’t). By the time I added up all of this, and threw in a weekend for me and hubby at a nice hotel, it was going to be like 5,000! I couldn’t believe it! It’s not like we were getting married the first time or something – we just wanted to renew our vows in a very no frills way and have a celebration.

    We had always wanted to go to Hawaii, and I decided to check it out. Well, by the time we were finished, 7 days in Hawaii and a ceremony with flowers and pictures was 2,000 cheaper!

    We went to Hawaii. That was two years ago. I never regretted the courthouse wedding; I don’t regret the Hawaii trip.

    The point is, it is hard to just say no. And, there is no such thing as a small wedding. They seem to grow and grow. So, destination weddings make perfect sense to me. If people do not wish to attend, they don’t have to. I do not agree with the brides who feel that "people should come to my special day even if it costs them a zillion dollars", but I think most people don’t feel that way.

    And, Hawaii is way better than Oklahoma (where I live).
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14. Bronnie

    2010 Jul 25 14

    I live in New Zealand and we are a nation of people who love to travel. So we often end up marrying people who are not from New Zealand. Because of this we often end up having weddings in places like the pacific islands so that we are in between families and don’t have to choose whether to get married in the brides country or the grooms. Also, they are smaller and more intimate, the family is included in the honeymoon, we get great all inclusive wedding deals that take the stress out of organising meals/venues etc and…. better chance of decent weather.

    I believe that the wedding is about the bride and groom and their immediate families, not every last hanger on who gets miffed if they can’t go.
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